Volunteers Needed for Science Experiment

Published Jul 24, 2013

yellowtail

Not-Mad-at-All Scientist Emily "Yellow Tail" Flynn

Shhhhh! Don't tell anyone, but I wrote that headline so that you can show your insignificant other that you are NOT simply wasting your life reading about which self-deluded teenage idol broke up with a different self-deluded teenage idol!

You are helping MANKIND by spending time online -- taking part in a real Science Experiment!

You can also cover your tracks if you get nailed at work fixating on the pin about "Family of Four Survives Nine Weeks on One Pine Cone Dipped in This [stuff]."

Our pal, Emily "Yellow Tail" Flynn, needs our help researching a Top Secret Science Experiment that she hopes will soon be made public in a Top Secret magazine that you can buy in supermarkets or view online.

All you have to do is take a short online survey. It's so easy that even I took it.

Yes, I was part of a scientific experiment. Oh, yeah.

Hint: When you answer Question Four, don't click on "I run two or more triathlons monthly," unless it's true. I'm not sure how, but I got busted for a bogus boast.

The survey will take you three minutes, but you can probably milk the excuse for months.

"Sorry, I'd love to help you [insert absurd request here] but I'm still working on that Top Secret Science Experiment. Maybe [insert name of loser family member here] could help?"

Yellow Tail only has one rule for those who partake in this Science Experiment:

"Please make sure you fill out every question. Incomplete data will be deleted in order to keep the statistics clear and accurate."

Yellow Tail said she'd share the results with us later.

For the sake of science, please take the test ... and tell a friend.

Click Here for Yellow Tail's Top Secret Science Experiment Survey


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About the Author Robert Sutherland:
Robert Sutherland is a travel writer enjoying life. Robert has two adult daughters and six grandchildren.
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